DE-FENCE

(Think condescending tone here)

Normally..when people invite us over

we ask them what their schedule is so...

                                                                                          - A comment I made to my wife

            

What is wrong with me? I know the above comment isn't "that bad" but honestly it really bugs me. Not just the comment, but really the tone of it. There are lots of things one could use a time machine for.... unfortunately I wouldn't be able to use it for any of those things. I would be to busy going back in time and slapping my smug face after every incident like this...and this happened a lot now that I think about it. It is kind of something I do. I think is something we all do. Let me make up a scenario where this happens.

I look at my friend and say "Did you know that 90's nickelodeon television was better than any other decade of t.v. ever? (We all know this statement is true). My friend responds with "No it wasn't and here are all the reasons I disagree with you". With a look of unwavering victory I say "well I hope you get hot lava poured into your eye sockets in a freezer so it instantly cools forming two clumps of rock in your skull before you trip into the ocean. Cause you can't see, cause you have 20/20 Graphsite. so.....

I wish it wasn't in my nature to be an ass. But it is and I really don't like it. I wish I was wired to be quick to say I was wrong or just SORRY, my mistake. Defensive people are annoying. You can't talk to them without wanting a popsicle stick shoved down your throat. 

A good defense makes a pooy husband.

Unless its spelled de-fence and your wife really hates fences.